Its time to begin again

Well folks, its time to begin again. I need to rejoin the blogger population. I started this blog as a way to keep in touch and to be one of my own personal therapy sessions. SO ... since I'm not prepared to write about all that has been going on since mom died, I am going to copy and paste some emails (edited) that I have been sending lately to fill those of you reading, in on my thoughts and adventures from the last few weeks. Enjoy. And keep sending me warm fuzzies 'cause I need 'em.

September 5

As you all know, no one could get mom more rilled up faster than AB in the last few years. D (sister) and I made sure of course, with Dad's help that all her "gifts" were on display. You may remember Dad very quickly hanging the crosstitch that had the "daily bread" picture on it. Well, she not only criticised the wreath which had apparently been hanging upside down, but she made it known that the daily bread thing was "meant for the kitchen, but I guess that will be okay." So...Dad had come to ask D and I what to do with the cross that had been engraved with mom's name on it. Since we had been making a lot of decisions, we wanted Dad to make this one. He went and asked AB where she thought he should put it. She had the nerve to say he could give it to her. Dad promptly told her that he wasn't asking to give it to her, but rather where HE could put it. He comes into the kitchen where I was and told me what happened. He also said that as soon as AB left, he was going to hang it on the same hook that he had so quickly hung the daily bread picture. As soon as she left this morning. The cross went up on the wall, and AB's crosstitch came down. I can't lie, but I think that is just awesome!

September 18 (There was one email in between this, but I can't seem to find it)

Well........I did somethnig kind of stupid and irresponsible this weekend. At 3:30pm after school on Friday I was thinking about how much stuff I have to do over the weekend, and it occured to me that even if I stayed all weekend (like last weekend) I would still have tons to do. So I says to myself...self, you can't sit in your classroom doing school work for the entire weekend again. So...I went home changed my clothes, hopped in my car and drove to Lethbridge. Now, I had planned on going to Edmonton (which is 3 hours away), but then I still wouldn't really have tons of people I know there...in Lethbridge (a mere 8 hours away) I have tons of people to visit with and have fun with. I know what you're thinking, Pinky...how can you drive 8 hours just to "hang out with friends for a day." Well I tell you I needed it, I loved it and I don't regret it.

I got in to Lethbridge about 11:30pm on Friday night and met my ex CT, and our mutual friend R at one of the local watering holes. I ditched my car there and we went to a couple of places to listen to music. I called up one of my roommates (and best friends), M, from last year and arranged to meet her after she got off work at The Duke (this great little pub near the University) and we gatherered up a few more friends and all sat around to catch up "tells some lies" etc. About 2am we (CT, R and I) went back to R's to watch a movie. Ct wasn't feeling well so he left (and I had already arranged to crash on R's couch) so R and I decided to watch a movie...put it in but ended up talking all night. He listened very well to what I had to say about mom, and he shared some stuff about him and it was very nice. So I finally crashed on his couch about 7 in the morning...I slept for a bit and then decided it was time to go get my car. So I got Ryan to take me to my car and then I did some shopping...nothing special, just some little things for my classroom. I went to Staples and hung out there for a while, catching up with the staff there and meeting some of the new staff (if you didn't know, I worked there all through Unviversity). Then Ct and I went to see Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (excellent movie by the way) and then M and I went out for dinner at my favorite restaurant. It was so great!! I just needed that little bit of "normal" for once. What I mean is that while school and Bonnyville is becoming my "normal" it isn't quite yet. The familiarity of Lethbridge was what I craved.

So....then I did something kind of dumb. After dinner (about 10pm) I could have stayed at Melissa's place, but I decided that I should head back to Bonnyville so that I would have time on Sunday to get some work done. That's right, at 10pm I was going to begin my 8 hour drive. Looking back I wonder about my brain cells. I did make the smart choice and chose the route that has more cities to go through because that way if I ran into trouble I wouldn't be "in the middle of nowhere." So the drive was going great, I wasn't tired or anything, I was still excited about how much fun I'd had...but around 3:30am I did start to get tired. So, I made the smart decision to pull over and have a nap. What I did that was stupid, was leave my lights on while I did it. I slept until 8:30am (oops!) I wake up and of course, my car wont' start. Crap. Well, I've got AMA but I can't really remember which town was the last I passed, so I don't really know where I am. All I can think at this point is...ya know, this is EXACTLY why mom hated it when I went on long road trips. I just can't seem to do them without some kind crisis. So I open my car hood, pull the booster cables out of my trunk (THANK YOU DAD!!) - although I wasn't sure why I did all this...booster cable only work when you've got another car to do the boosting!

Anyway, not 2 minutes later but a very kind man stoped, laughed at my story, boosted my car, and I was on my way. As I started my car, I could hear mom saying "You've got horseshoes up you..." well, you get it.

So yeah, I'm a little crazy I gues, but it all works out right? I have not regrets about the trip in general, I just should have stayed at M's Saturday. I know better now. Honest.